This is an older video post that now lives in the Understanding Men Section. It was originally published when this Substack first launched, so only a small number of people saw it. I’m reposting it because it’s an important piece, and I plan to bring back a few other early posts that didn’t get the attention they deserved. I’ll usually be posting them on Saturdays.
Thanks, Tom and Aman. I filed a gender bias complaint against Kaiser because they have plaques on the wall in exam rooms that mention breast and cervical cancer, but there is nothing for prostate and cervical cancer. Kaiser closed out my complaint the day after they opened it. They told me that Kaiser is "inclusive" despite the fact that they exclude men.
Aman's concept of acceptable prejudice is really important here. The idea that therapists can't build genuine relationships with male clients without recognizing these biases is spot on. It's refreshing to see this kind of work being done in clinical psychology when the field has been so silent on these isues for so long.
This was a fantastic interview and yes, we need more, much more of Dr. Siddiqi. I mean, with respect, what are you waiting for, man? What if you get hit by a bus tomorrow? All of the unique content of that precious brain of yours would then be lost to us forever. We need you now, not later. Thanks to both of you for your courage and perseverance, which I admire, in the work of men's rights activism.
I came across Dr. Siddiqi's thesis late at night a year or two ago while scrolling some social media platform. I remember thinking, "Wow, a scholarly dissertation on the prejudices men face? This is required reading for every MRA. I've got to get on this." I saved the PDF to my phone, where it has since languished, I'm ashamed to say, in the Downloads folder, left unread. Partly this is because I tend to forget the Downloads folder exists. It may also be partly that I fear to read it. I don't seem to know how to cope with the strong feelings that this subject provokes within me, which means those feelings, on top of my lifelong depression, isolation, abysmal self-esteem and suicidality, risk derailing my day-to-day life.
This brings me to something I've been wanting to ask fellow MRA's. As precisely the people Dr. Siddiqi described in this video - the slim minority of people who persist long enough in their examination of societal attitudes to encounter the final stage of prejudice-maintenance, the attack stage - I would like to ask what is everyone's experience of being this sort of person. Is it difficult for you and, if so, how do you cope?
I mentioned that I struggle with lifelong depression, isolation, poor self-esteem and suicidality. Now that I've typed that sentence, I don't know how much of this is actually congruous with being (for lack of a better term) an MRA, and how much emanates from other things in my life that weren't great - and whether, after all, those two domains aren't actually as separate as they might, at first, appear to be. My 'activism', if you can call it that, is limited to online interactions, partly because I've thus far mostly lacked the courage, as yet, to engage people face-to-face, but even so, the virtually monolithic rejection, shaming, attacks, etc., (which occasionally spill over into real life (as women, I've learned, have a real tendency to cyberstalk men who stand up for themselves online, stalking every social media profile and post they can find, garnering whatever info they can from online data brokers, threatening to "out" MRA's to their wives (like my wife doesn't already know who I am) and employers (a more threatening possibility), etc.)) take a significant personal toll on me. I am at a loss to relate to those who brush off such interactions easily. I feel the weight of the marginalization of my entire experience of life on the part of society, and it is not a feeling I know how to tolerate for long. Thus I take my 'activism' in small bites.
In this regard, I've come to take an interest in those who have experienced this marginalization before me. Most notable are, obviously I assume, the experiences of black people, especially those of slaves. (I was gratified that Dr. Siddiqi mentioned Uncle Tom's Cabin in this interview.) But also, I've recently begun to find succor in the works of radical feminists, believe it or not. This actually began a long time ago, when I discovered the concept of the safe space (which MRA's sadly tend to eschew, I believe very much to our collective detriment) in the now-defunct LiveJournal called "feminist-rage." The purpose of that LJ was to permit women the freedom they needed to express in an uncensored way their thoughts and feelings about men, women and society. Likewise, the works of the late radical feminist and poet, Adrienne Rich, consciously choose to speak in the first person singular, as I like to say, not from some more abstract, universal perspective that is removed from the interiority of her life as a woman - which, I've noticed, is how we men tend to speak, again to our detriment, I believe. I started with a thin volume that she published in the early 70's, called "Diving into the Wreck," and followed by taking out a collection of essays called "Arts of the Possible." I believe Adrienne Rich has a lot to teach us about activism, defiance, self-expression, and about revolutionary spirit and activity. She has been confirming an idea that I'd begun to have already on my own (imbibed, no doubt, from the ether), namely that one of the most viable paths to change, if not the only real path, is art. The one thing I haven't seen much from MRA's is art. We're didactic. We like essays, podcasts, argument. We don't go in much for poetry, music, painting - I suspect all of these could be pretty covert, if so desired, and yet nonetheless subversive, if presented in the right way - a painting in an art gallery, for example, that somehow highlights a painful aspect of the relationship of the male to modern society. Or it could be loud and proud, like Solanas' Scum Manifesto.
Currently, a small ambition of mine is to use my X account as a platform for publishing small poems of my own that try to get at aspects of male life that MRA's preferred modes of self-expression are not apt to highlight by their very nature. I'm not sure whether this little project will ever get anywhere... because I've never written much poetry 😂 That's a pretty large hill to climb along the way.
For now, I guess my point is to try to relate more to my fellow MRA's. What is the experience of being an MRA for you? Is it hard? Do you lose faith? in women? men? the future? Do you feel strange? Do you feel almost like an outcast sometimes? How do you cope with the difficult and painful realities of not only knowing more than most people do about male life, but the fact that you consistently choose to engage people on these matters, whether online or off?
You state "...This brings me to something I've been wanting to ask fellow MRA's. As precisely the people Dr. Siddiqi described in this video - the slim minority of people who persist long enough in their examination of societal attitudes to encounter the final stage of prejudice-maintenance, the attack stage - I would like to ask what is everyone's experience of being this sort of person. Is it difficult for you and, if so, how do you cope?"
I don't regard myself as an MRA, but as a survivor I campaign for more equable recognition of male victims of domestic abuse. I have put myself forward as a volunteer for several organizations that claim to support male as well as female victims. The misandry reveals itself quite quickly, when I point out that their training does not contain any adult male victim case studies and they kick me out, very often making false allegations. What effect does all this have on me? Psychologically it's bloody tough I can tell you. I often look at what they do in sheer disbelief, but by raising these concerns I have acquired so much written evidence of what their attitude to men who want to help really is. This has been going on for so many years and I look at it in abject disbelief. It feels like a grief that never ends. The behavior of these organizations that exist to support people who have been abused feels very much like - coercive and controlling abuse! I cope by remembering that they continue to provide me with plenty of evidence. It is down there in black and white.
About your reference to mental Blindness - evil-insanity acceptances; Synagogue of Satan's Gov-Corp-Professional coordinated mind-raped programmed demonic-directed golem populations.
Comedy often targets someone or some group. Some comedians, like Dave Chappelle claim that there wouldn't be any comedy if you couldn't insult people. You seem to claim that all of this sort of comedy is bigoted.
LOL, I loved the talk but he seemed to leave little room for the importance of humor in revealing on going injustices. He suggests that those who poke fun at feminism are no different than those who long ago ridiculed slaves. Not very nuanced.
Thanks, Tom and Aman. I filed a gender bias complaint against Kaiser because they have plaques on the wall in exam rooms that mention breast and cervical cancer, but there is nothing for prostate and cervical cancer. Kaiser closed out my complaint the day after they opened it. They told me that Kaiser is "inclusive" despite the fact that they exclude men.
Feminism creates anti male bias and sexism, they always have. i wish i had the rights women have. some of their rights amount to luxury.
Aman's concept of acceptable prejudice is really important here. The idea that therapists can't build genuine relationships with male clients without recognizing these biases is spot on. It's refreshing to see this kind of work being done in clinical psychology when the field has been so silent on these isues for so long.
Deeply insightful conversation here. Thanks for recording this Tom, and for prompting a return to this...
This was a fantastic interview and yes, we need more, much more of Dr. Siddiqi. I mean, with respect, what are you waiting for, man? What if you get hit by a bus tomorrow? All of the unique content of that precious brain of yours would then be lost to us forever. We need you now, not later. Thanks to both of you for your courage and perseverance, which I admire, in the work of men's rights activism.
I came across Dr. Siddiqi's thesis late at night a year or two ago while scrolling some social media platform. I remember thinking, "Wow, a scholarly dissertation on the prejudices men face? This is required reading for every MRA. I've got to get on this." I saved the PDF to my phone, where it has since languished, I'm ashamed to say, in the Downloads folder, left unread. Partly this is because I tend to forget the Downloads folder exists. It may also be partly that I fear to read it. I don't seem to know how to cope with the strong feelings that this subject provokes within me, which means those feelings, on top of my lifelong depression, isolation, abysmal self-esteem and suicidality, risk derailing my day-to-day life.
This brings me to something I've been wanting to ask fellow MRA's. As precisely the people Dr. Siddiqi described in this video - the slim minority of people who persist long enough in their examination of societal attitudes to encounter the final stage of prejudice-maintenance, the attack stage - I would like to ask what is everyone's experience of being this sort of person. Is it difficult for you and, if so, how do you cope?
I mentioned that I struggle with lifelong depression, isolation, poor self-esteem and suicidality. Now that I've typed that sentence, I don't know how much of this is actually congruous with being (for lack of a better term) an MRA, and how much emanates from other things in my life that weren't great - and whether, after all, those two domains aren't actually as separate as they might, at first, appear to be. My 'activism', if you can call it that, is limited to online interactions, partly because I've thus far mostly lacked the courage, as yet, to engage people face-to-face, but even so, the virtually monolithic rejection, shaming, attacks, etc., (which occasionally spill over into real life (as women, I've learned, have a real tendency to cyberstalk men who stand up for themselves online, stalking every social media profile and post they can find, garnering whatever info they can from online data brokers, threatening to "out" MRA's to their wives (like my wife doesn't already know who I am) and employers (a more threatening possibility), etc.)) take a significant personal toll on me. I am at a loss to relate to those who brush off such interactions easily. I feel the weight of the marginalization of my entire experience of life on the part of society, and it is not a feeling I know how to tolerate for long. Thus I take my 'activism' in small bites.
In this regard, I've come to take an interest in those who have experienced this marginalization before me. Most notable are, obviously I assume, the experiences of black people, especially those of slaves. (I was gratified that Dr. Siddiqi mentioned Uncle Tom's Cabin in this interview.) But also, I've recently begun to find succor in the works of radical feminists, believe it or not. This actually began a long time ago, when I discovered the concept of the safe space (which MRA's sadly tend to eschew, I believe very much to our collective detriment) in the now-defunct LiveJournal called "feminist-rage." The purpose of that LJ was to permit women the freedom they needed to express in an uncensored way their thoughts and feelings about men, women and society. Likewise, the works of the late radical feminist and poet, Adrienne Rich, consciously choose to speak in the first person singular, as I like to say, not from some more abstract, universal perspective that is removed from the interiority of her life as a woman - which, I've noticed, is how we men tend to speak, again to our detriment, I believe. I started with a thin volume that she published in the early 70's, called "Diving into the Wreck," and followed by taking out a collection of essays called "Arts of the Possible." I believe Adrienne Rich has a lot to teach us about activism, defiance, self-expression, and about revolutionary spirit and activity. She has been confirming an idea that I'd begun to have already on my own (imbibed, no doubt, from the ether), namely that one of the most viable paths to change, if not the only real path, is art. The one thing I haven't seen much from MRA's is art. We're didactic. We like essays, podcasts, argument. We don't go in much for poetry, music, painting - I suspect all of these could be pretty covert, if so desired, and yet nonetheless subversive, if presented in the right way - a painting in an art gallery, for example, that somehow highlights a painful aspect of the relationship of the male to modern society. Or it could be loud and proud, like Solanas' Scum Manifesto.
Currently, a small ambition of mine is to use my X account as a platform for publishing small poems of my own that try to get at aspects of male life that MRA's preferred modes of self-expression are not apt to highlight by their very nature. I'm not sure whether this little project will ever get anywhere... because I've never written much poetry 😂 That's a pretty large hill to climb along the way.
For now, I guess my point is to try to relate more to my fellow MRA's. What is the experience of being an MRA for you? Is it hard? Do you lose faith? in women? men? the future? Do you feel strange? Do you feel almost like an outcast sometimes? How do you cope with the difficult and painful realities of not only knowing more than most people do about male life, but the fact that you consistently choose to engage people on these matters, whether online or off?
You state "...This brings me to something I've been wanting to ask fellow MRA's. As precisely the people Dr. Siddiqi described in this video - the slim minority of people who persist long enough in their examination of societal attitudes to encounter the final stage of prejudice-maintenance, the attack stage - I would like to ask what is everyone's experience of being this sort of person. Is it difficult for you and, if so, how do you cope?"
I don't regard myself as an MRA, but as a survivor I campaign for more equable recognition of male victims of domestic abuse. I have put myself forward as a volunteer for several organizations that claim to support male as well as female victims. The misandry reveals itself quite quickly, when I point out that their training does not contain any adult male victim case studies and they kick me out, very often making false allegations. What effect does all this have on me? Psychologically it's bloody tough I can tell you. I often look at what they do in sheer disbelief, but by raising these concerns I have acquired so much written evidence of what their attitude to men who want to help really is. This has been going on for so many years and I look at it in abject disbelief. It feels like a grief that never ends. The behavior of these organizations that exist to support people who have been abused feels very much like - coercive and controlling abuse! I cope by remembering that they continue to provide me with plenty of evidence. It is down there in black and white.
Feminism is not about equality
It is an ideology based on nothing but hatred of men and boys and is really all about power and SPECIAL STATUS FOR WOMEN IN ALL THINGS
Feminism is the largest hate movement the world has ever seen
They hate 1/2 of world’s entire population
"AI generated overview - Why Society Accepts Prejudice Against Men" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-pHi9CZ3zVA
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About your reference to mental Blindness - evil-insanity acceptances; Synagogue of Satan's Gov-Corp-Professional coordinated mind-raped programmed demonic-directed golem populations.
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"Multiverse Journal - Index Number 2227:, 27th September 2025, The Ongoing Worldwide Rape of Mind and Soul to fully realize Homo Umbrans" https://stevenwork.substack.com/p/multiverse-journal-index-number-2227 https://archive.ph/iZIxg
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Feedback welcome.
God Bless., Steve
Comedy often targets someone or some group. Some comedians, like Dave Chappelle claim that there wouldn't be any comedy if you couldn't insult people. You seem to claim that all of this sort of comedy is bigoted.
Happened to find this funny example on Phill Andry's account on X:
"A feminist, a teacher and a child molestor walked into a bar.
She ordered a drink."
😂
LOL, I loved the talk but he seemed to leave little room for the importance of humor in revealing on going injustices. He suggests that those who poke fun at feminism are no different than those who long ago ridiculed slaves. Not very nuanced.
I wonder what comedy would look like the hands of an MRA who was any good at it.