Watch now (4 mins) | Excerpt from “Helping Mothers be Closer to Their Sons“ pages 22-27 DIFFERENCES IN WAYS OF GETTING WHAT YOU WANT The sexes are different in their strategies to get what they want. This difference starts early. Boys tend to be more physical and direct, demanding or playfully pushing another boy in order to obtain what he wants. Girls don’t seem to like this sort of method. Girls are more likely to use words or relational means to get what they want. Boys tend not to respond to this. Neither sex seems to be too keen on the other’s modes.
Men do well when they've something to fight for with other men, something to accomplish that requires full engagement. The modern world has taken away the pride in male endeavour and left men disspirited. A first priority common task is to fight for genuine loving equality with women. Then the two sexes together can help restore the balance in the world. Separate both sexes are shadows of their powerful selves.
Fascinating! My wife had a summer camp. Even as an outside observer, I was able to see these behaviors play out.
I think these evolutionary traits do not translate well in our technologically based society. As corporations & the military become more feminized, men are at a distinct disadvantage. This may contribute to the high suicide rate among men.
Take for example the military, it is still numerically dominated by men. However, recently the focus has been on women & moving them into positions of power. If you looked at the military code of conduct policy for harassment, you will see that it is oriented to how women relate. Men relate in ways that would go against this code of conduct.
This gives women a distinct implicit power & many use this to their advantage. Of course they would. We all seek to improve our lot in life. Women know that at any time they can report a man for harassment. The worst being sexual harassment. This can be used as a weapon for retaliation or to eliminate a rival. Male officers are afraid to take a man's side, knowing the consequences could be a loss of advancement or career. You see similar situations play out in the corporate world.
Even the way women deal with social conflict as you aptly pointed out, works much better in the world we live in today. Our society has become more feminized. Especially with the influence of DEI. Our focus on moving as many women as possible into positions of power doesn't bode well for men. In fact, I think this imbalance & the societal acceptance of deference to women creates division & resentment. It's permeating our entire society. Sadly, the capture of our institutions by radical feminist stifles men voices.
My suggestion would be to offer training courses discussing what you have pointed out. Then single sex, gender specific classes with instruction on how to navigate this new world. I think this is particularly important for men. We already do this for women.
My comment is obviously centered on men's needs. However, it does not diminish the challenges women face. I just think it's time we started paying attention to mens needs. Since the 60's, our entire focus has been on women. When men do well, women benefit & vice versa.
Thank you! That would be great. What did you have in mind? I wrote it fast so could do a quick review today. Would be honored if you had any suggestions. My goal is just to get the word out to as many people as possible.
No, I don't really have any ideas to make it better. I think it is excellent as it stands. It would be good to change a word here or there that would make it more a stand along piece especially where you refer to the video. Great that you are willing to do this. Please add what you think is best!
Men do well when they've something to fight for with other men, something to accomplish that requires full engagement. The modern world has taken away the pride in male endeavour and left men disspirited. A first priority common task is to fight for genuine loving equality with women. Then the two sexes together can help restore the balance in the world. Separate both sexes are shadows of their powerful selves.
Agree. Men's best qualities have been shamed and now when the same qualities are seen in women they are applauded.
Fascinating! My wife had a summer camp. Even as an outside observer, I was able to see these behaviors play out.
I think these evolutionary traits do not translate well in our technologically based society. As corporations & the military become more feminized, men are at a distinct disadvantage. This may contribute to the high suicide rate among men.
Take for example the military, it is still numerically dominated by men. However, recently the focus has been on women & moving them into positions of power. If you looked at the military code of conduct policy for harassment, you will see that it is oriented to how women relate. Men relate in ways that would go against this code of conduct.
This gives women a distinct implicit power & many use this to their advantage. Of course they would. We all seek to improve our lot in life. Women know that at any time they can report a man for harassment. The worst being sexual harassment. This can be used as a weapon for retaliation or to eliminate a rival. Male officers are afraid to take a man's side, knowing the consequences could be a loss of advancement or career. You see similar situations play out in the corporate world.
Even the way women deal with social conflict as you aptly pointed out, works much better in the world we live in today. Our society has become more feminized. Especially with the influence of DEI. Our focus on moving as many women as possible into positions of power doesn't bode well for men. In fact, I think this imbalance & the societal acceptance of deference to women creates division & resentment. It's permeating our entire society. Sadly, the capture of our institutions by radical feminist stifles men voices.
My suggestion would be to offer training courses discussing what you have pointed out. Then single sex, gender specific classes with instruction on how to navigate this new world. I think this is particularly important for men. We already do this for women.
My comment is obviously centered on men's needs. However, it does not diminish the challenges women face. I just think it's time we started paying attention to mens needs. Since the 60's, our entire focus has been on women. When men do well, women benefit & vice versa.
Great points. I am wondering if we can turn this comment into a post? Would you be willing to do that? Would you want to edit or add anything?
Thank you! That would be great. What did you have in mind? I wrote it fast so could do a quick review today. Would be honored if you had any suggestions. My goal is just to get the word out to as many people as possible.
No, I don't really have any ideas to make it better. I think it is excellent as it stands. It would be good to change a word here or there that would make it more a stand along piece especially where you refer to the video. Great that you are willing to do this. Please add what you think is best!